I used to have dreams of being with someone from my high school years later.
Every time I tried with a high school classmate it just never worked out and none of them waited for me to be with me at the right time.
I also forgot my other dream. When I went to Saint Mary's College, I always wanted to marry a Notre Dame boy and have SMC bridesmaids. I can't believe I was surprised with my other dream I thought I had to forget.
Every time I tried with a high school classmate it just never worked out and none of them waited for me to be with me at the right time.
I also forgot my other dream. When I went to Saint Mary's College, I always wanted to marry a Notre Dame boy and have SMC bridesmaids. I can't believe I was surprised with my other dream I thought I had to forget.
The entire Morrissey Hall boy dorm did ask why a random girl from Saint Mary's College kept hanging out with Chris, Steve and Dean. They said, "Who is this girl? Why is she always hanging out with Chris, Steve and Dean?" We had to say because most ND and SMC girls were bitches to her and didn't invite her anywhere and she just wanted friends from ND to hang out with so we hung out a lot and they finally got it. I was purposely annoying Dean Fernandez when I had a crush and when I was annoying to him he would keep unfriending me until I stopped being annoying, lmfao. He friended me back when I stopped being annoying. He also had a crush back and admitted it by taking me to the hotel to meet the entire ND boys swim team and they all wanted to kiss me on the cheek to be blessed because they saw how Chris, Steve, and Dean were blessed from hanging out with me a lot. Dean does know I like Zach Einterz more than him, though, and he accepted that. The crush on Dean was in college and I am with Zach Einterz now.
They finally confessed that the fan convention I went to was planned and just for me and other fans. They knew I would go to the convention and Andrew Keegan got a picture with me. Joseph Gordon-Levitt yeeted from the meet and greet. I felt the yeet.
I thought I was just a fan crushing on celebrities. I didn't know they could sense my crush right through the TV.
Years later when Connor could finally talk to me he admitted he had a crush back and didn't know who I was.
I suggested he should date his co-star who can hang out with him because I'm with Zach Einterz now. I thought he was gay and had a boyfriend. Maybe he just has to meet the right girl if he had a crush on me and he didn't know if I was real or not and had a crush, LOL.
Years later when Connor could finally talk to me he admitted he had a crush back and didn't know who I was.
I suggested he should date his co-star who can hang out with him because I'm with Zach Einterz now. I thought he was gay and had a boyfriend. Maybe he just has to meet the right girl if he had a crush on me and he didn't know if I was real or not and had a crush, LOL.
Keith Ziolkowski pretended to have fake drama with me and Paul Wehle and Nick Zilkowski. Keith would be fake jealous that I hung out with Nick as friends a lot. We were just friends, though, and I had no crush on Nick. I would see Keith be fake salty to me and Nick during band and orchestra rehearsals and I'd just keep laughing at Keith's fake drama the whole time. Keith wanted to hang out with me the way Nick hung out with me, but I was more friends with Nick than Keith. Nick and Keith are not cousins. They just have a similar last name.
I then gave Mona, the other Chinese girl a year older than me Marinus' AIM name because he grossed me out so she could have the other twin who I didn't want. Yes, I gave her the gross twin and I drew a heart around Julian in the 7th grade yearbook. I didn't know which twin was which and every time I saw them I just gave both of them the stink eye and they felt the salt from me.
Ryan Moore never held back the salt. He let our entire grade know why he was mean to me all throughout high school. We are all friends now. I had to let him know he is a crush fantasy. He's a Clay High School wedding reunion friend invite. I wanted to invite all of our friends in the same grade as us to my wedding with Zach Einterz. Ryan is fine now but he still won't friend me, though. I won't ignore him if I see him in person. We can talk now because his brother is married and has a baby and I'm with Zach Einterz.
This happened in high school 23ish years ago. We are over it, LOL.
This happened in high school 23ish years ago. We are over it, LOL.
In college, I had an ex named Dan Myers who lived in the same Notre Dame boy dorm as Joe Geglio. I couldn't believe it at the time that Dan knew Joe. I met Dan from elsewhere and he happened to know Joe, too. Joe Geglio brought the Clay High School salt to the Notre Dame campus at Keough Hall.
I kept wondering why people at school were acting so salty to me and giving me shady glares. The salt was from both guys and girls, not just guys who weren't a fantasy. At the time, I didn't understand it. And then I realized, the guys didn't want to date those girls who were mean to me because all my guy classmates wanted to be a fantasy for me.
On a bored day, my teenage self would come up with lots of fantasies about having crushes on my classmates. I didn't want to be that girl who thirsts over celebrities who will never date or marry me. I've seen a girl waste 25 years of her life thirsting over a celebrity she will never have and she's never dated anyone at all and doesn't have any friends as classmates because she kept thirsting over a Hollywood celebrity who doesn't want to take a fan photo with her because she acted weird pretending to be with a celebrity.
I preferred thirsting over my hot classmates so I came up with a bunch of fantasies to myself.
I knew I would end up with a high school or college classmate and I was seeing which fantasy would come true.
I thought it was only to myself. I had no idea that all my classmates could hear my fantasies as I made them up and they all wanted to be a fantasy and when some weren't fantasies they gave me mean glares. LOL. I was just thinking fantasies in my bedroom all to myself.
I had fantasies for girls, too.
I wanted a girl best friend with the same name as me, two friends who were girls to date two guys who are friends, two sisters and two brothers dating, meeting a group of girls in college to be my bridesmaids but they were mostly mean and jealous because most of the guys wanted me and not them and they nearly missed out on their fantasies. I did say I wanted a Chinese girl best friend like myself, but when I met one or two in college they were jealous I got to hang out at Morrissey Hall with most of the boys at that dorm and they didn't have that kind of friendship with any boy. I even went to an all girls' college, Saint Mary's College and still couldn't find a group of girls there to be my bridesmaids.
I had a list of fantasies:
-my number one fantasy was being with a Boy Jessie - a guy with the same name as me. I knew that wasn't going to happen so I had to call a mystery boy, Boy Jessie instead. I had to accept there were no Jesses at my school at all and that being with someone who is most like myself is the next best thing. . .this would be who my true future husband is but I didn't know who the Boy Jessie at my school was at the time. I kept asking myself, "Where are you, Boy Jessie? Who are you?" I didn't know at the time.
-the J-name fantasy - having the same first letter as me to be Jessie and a J-name
-the birthday twin fantasy - having a crush on someone with the same birthday as me
-the soccer player fantasy -- for some reason I had a crush on a few soccer players
-someone's brother
-brother-brother: seeing which brother will confess
-neighbor boy
-twin fantasies - having a crush on twins and seeing which one will confess
-Orchestra/Band stand partner sandwich - having a crush on two guys who sit next to each other for orchestra/band to see which one will confess
-having a crush on two roommates for a college dorm room fantasy to see which one will confess
-a marine military fantasy - I had wanted to join the military to be in the military marching band for exercise but I knew I was not a military girl and I wanted a military marines guy to crush on, too.
-I had wanted to befriend other fans at conventions or fan forums to invite them to my wedding.
-I also wanted to meet celebrities who can be in my T.V. Show project that I'm working on.
-I also wanted to meet a political best friend on a politics forum to invite to my wedding.
-I wanted to also have a crush on a hater's brother fantasy just to spite his sister for being mean.
On a bored day, my teenage self would come up with lots of fantasies about having crushes on my classmates. I didn't want to be that girl who thirsts over celebrities who will never date or marry me. I've seen a girl waste 25 years of her life thirsting over a celebrity she will never have and she's never dated anyone at all and doesn't have any friends as classmates because she kept thirsting over a Hollywood celebrity who doesn't want to take a fan photo with her because she acted weird pretending to be with a celebrity.
I preferred thirsting over my hot classmates so I came up with a bunch of fantasies to myself.
I knew I would end up with a high school or college classmate and I was seeing which fantasy would come true.
I thought it was only to myself. I had no idea that all my classmates could hear my fantasies as I made them up and they all wanted to be a fantasy and when some weren't fantasies they gave me mean glares. LOL. I was just thinking fantasies in my bedroom all to myself.
I had fantasies for girls, too.
I wanted a girl best friend with the same name as me, two friends who were girls to date two guys who are friends, two sisters and two brothers dating, meeting a group of girls in college to be my bridesmaids but they were mostly mean and jealous because most of the guys wanted me and not them and they nearly missed out on their fantasies. I did say I wanted a Chinese girl best friend like myself, but when I met one or two in college they were jealous I got to hang out at Morrissey Hall with most of the boys at that dorm and they didn't have that kind of friendship with any boy. I even went to an all girls' college, Saint Mary's College and still couldn't find a group of girls there to be my bridesmaids.
I had a list of fantasies:
-my number one fantasy was being with a Boy Jessie - a guy with the same name as me. I knew that wasn't going to happen so I had to call a mystery boy, Boy Jessie instead. I had to accept there were no Jesses at my school at all and that being with someone who is most like myself is the next best thing. . .this would be who my true future husband is but I didn't know who the Boy Jessie at my school was at the time. I kept asking myself, "Where are you, Boy Jessie? Who are you?" I didn't know at the time.
-the J-name fantasy - having the same first letter as me to be Jessie and a J-name
-the birthday twin fantasy - having a crush on someone with the same birthday as me
-the soccer player fantasy -- for some reason I had a crush on a few soccer players
-someone's brother
-brother-brother: seeing which brother will confess
-neighbor boy
-twin fantasies - having a crush on twins and seeing which one will confess
-Orchestra/Band stand partner sandwich - having a crush on two guys who sit next to each other for orchestra/band to see which one will confess
-having a crush on two roommates for a college dorm room fantasy to see which one will confess
-a marine military fantasy - I had wanted to join the military to be in the military marching band for exercise but I knew I was not a military girl and I wanted a military marines guy to crush on, too.
-I had wanted to befriend other fans at conventions or fan forums to invite them to my wedding.
-I also wanted to meet celebrities who can be in my T.V. Show project that I'm working on.
-I also wanted to meet a political best friend on a politics forum to invite to my wedding.
-I wanted to also have a crush on a hater's brother fantasy just to spite his sister for being mean.
YouTube: @jessiediariesessa/@essaberrydiaries
IG: @essaberrydiaries/@westcoastlifenew
TikTok: @diariesofjessie
IG: @essaberrydiaries/@westcoastlifenew
TikTok: @diariesofjessie
The Fantasy Diary
This is a book and TV Show project I'm currently working on with celebrities like Jacob Elordi, Zac Efron and Tom Felton.
I am not making any 40 hour a week income from this. This is a hobby that I do in my free time. I am currently unemployed.
They are helping me to promote my book and TV Show as well as M. Lauryl Lewis, an indie writer who isn't famous. Please read her zombie books and let her know how her writing is in the reviews. My book and TV Show are for new and old actors and actresses who want to continue acting in new projects.
I'm also editing the project with classmates, friends, and editors. This will be the cover to my book.
If any extras, makeup crew, audio visual techs, food catering businesses like Gordon Ramsey/bradtheboxer/Donut Daddy, etc., writers/editors, directors, film makers, actors and actresses are interested in being a part of my project, please get a hold of Jacob Elordi, Zac Efron or Tom Felton.
I am not making any 40 hour a week income from this. This is a hobby that I do in my free time. I am currently unemployed.
They are helping me to promote my book and TV Show as well as M. Lauryl Lewis, an indie writer who isn't famous. Please read her zombie books and let her know how her writing is in the reviews. My book and TV Show are for new and old actors and actresses who want to continue acting in new projects.
I'm also editing the project with classmates, friends, and editors. This will be the cover to my book.
If any extras, makeup crew, audio visual techs, food catering businesses like Gordon Ramsey/bradtheboxer/Donut Daddy, etc., writers/editors, directors, film makers, actors and actresses are interested in being a part of my project, please get a hold of Jacob Elordi, Zac Efron or Tom Felton.
I always wanted to write a story that sounded so fake that no one believes it is real but it's all real life and none of it is fiction. Now I have the story with celebrities like Jacob Elordi, Zac Efron, and Tom Felton. And I don't end up with any of them. I end up with someone I went to college with after chatting with three somewhat famous celebrities.
And yet, my true future husband is someone I went to college with this whole time. I always wanted it to be Zach Einterz but I thought I had to forget him because after everyone graduated, everyone moved away and I didn't know how it would happen.
And yet, my true future husband is someone I went to college with this whole time. I always wanted it to be Zach Einterz but I thought I had to forget him because after everyone graduated, everyone moved away and I didn't know how it would happen.
To All The Boys I've Loved Before
Sometimes, I wondered what my life would be like in a fictional setting.
I only get my ideas from my non-fiction events. I'm not really good at writing fictional stories.
To All the Boys reminds me of my real life but fictionalized, LOL.
It's also no coincidence that the main character who is a girl is Asian, just like me - Lana Condor.
The three Asian sisters are me - Lara Jean, older sister - Mona Yeh, youngest sister - Rachel Brandon.
The five boys from high school are:
1. Michael David Pierrat - a lusty neighbor boy
2. Paul Wehle - Kenny Donati
3. Andrew Wiand - John Ambrose -- Andrew and I did stare at each other for one second in real life and never spoke in real life. HAHA
4. Drew Cramer - who I forgot was the high school boyfriend and prom date - Lucas in the movie, LOL.
5. Jay Vagharase - Josh Sanderson, the next door neighbor boy, how fitting J-name
Sometimes, I wondered what my life would be like in a fictional setting.
I only get my ideas from my non-fiction events. I'm not really good at writing fictional stories.
To All the Boys reminds me of my real life but fictionalized, LOL.
It's also no coincidence that the main character who is a girl is Asian, just like me - Lana Condor.
The three Asian sisters are me - Lara Jean, older sister - Mona Yeh, youngest sister - Rachel Brandon.
The five boys from high school are:
1. Michael David Pierrat - a lusty neighbor boy
2. Paul Wehle - Kenny Donati
3. Andrew Wiand - John Ambrose -- Andrew and I did stare at each other for one second in real life and never spoke in real life. HAHA
4. Drew Cramer - who I forgot was the high school boyfriend and prom date - Lucas in the movie, LOL.
5. Jay Vagharase - Josh Sanderson, the next door neighbor boy, how fitting J-name
I'm currently in the middle of writing my own TV Show and book. Can't wait for it to be published.
While I'm waiting to hear back from a job offer, I have my hobbies like TV Show writing and book writing to work on.
While I'm waiting to hear back from a job offer, I have my hobbies like TV Show writing and book writing to work on.
Back to the Future I, II, III is one of my favorite trilogies to re-watch. It's a classic!
Pan-Tech, Inc. is a freelancing company I work for on the side. I own the company. I'm still looking for a 40-80 hour work week.
Pan-Tech is an evening or weekend part-time position. I don't get paid for the work. It's just to gain more experiences.
Once in a while I will get paid for the work, but it doesn't make me enough to afford my own apartment. It just pays for meals.
Pan-Tech is an evening or weekend part-time position. I don't get paid for the work. It's just to gain more experiences.
Once in a while I will get paid for the work, but it doesn't make me enough to afford my own apartment. It just pays for meals.
